Burnout
What was I thinking? That I could just keep going like a steamroller? That once my Mandarin Chinese classes ended and my schedule was freed up, that I'd be able to just switch gears and focus on all the other things I've been putting off?
I knew full well what had to be sacrified to be a full-time student (of Mandarin Chinese) while teaching full-time, but now that Mandarin Chinese classes have ended, I've been feeling the GUILT. The cripping, self-sabotaging, overwhelming guilt- spiralling out of control.
My optimism and momentum seem to have vanished into thin air.
Wonder if I'm coming down with a minor case of seasonal affective disorder. The sunny days of Kaohsiung have been snatched away, and now it's all dull, dark and grey.
One thing's for sure I'd better start doing something! Anything!
I knew full well what had to be sacrified to be a full-time student (of Mandarin Chinese) while teaching full-time, but now that Mandarin Chinese classes have ended, I've been feeling the GUILT. The cripping, self-sabotaging, overwhelming guilt- spiralling out of control.
My optimism and momentum seem to have vanished into thin air.
Wonder if I'm coming down with a minor case of seasonal affective disorder. The sunny days of Kaohsiung have been snatched away, and now it's all dull, dark and grey.
One thing's for sure I'd better start doing something! Anything!
1 Comments:
At 12/17/2005 6:44 AM,
Anonymous said…
Learning Mandarin is burning you out?
I did feel the same long time ago.
Hope you like the poem:
The Winds of Fate
?One ship drives east and another drives west
?With the selfsame winds that blow.
?'Tis the set of the sails
?And not the gales
?Which tells us the way to go.
?Like the winds of the sea are the ways of fate,
?As we voyage along through life:
?'Tis the set of a soul
?That decides its goal,
?And not the calm or the strife.
??---Ella Wheeler Wilcox
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