Writer's Block

The USA is the place I was born. Canada is the place I was raised. Taiwan is the place in my heart.

Tuesday, December 05, 2006

Generosity must be extended without expectations
Otherwise resentment breeds
Resentment is a relationship's silent poison


  • At 12/06/2006 9:41 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Those whom we sacrifice for we soon come to resent, as the saying goes. Generosity without payback is only possible when we don't know the people involved. But you can't be unexpectingly generous with the people who are your friends. We live in webs of reciprocity, and we define our friendships that way.


  • At 12/07/2006 9:14 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    There is a difference between generosity and reciprocity. Generosity means giving without any expectations. In this screwed up world of ours, people tend to confuse reciprocity with generosity. If your friendships are defined in terms of reciprocity, you should really re-evaluate what type of "friendships" you have.


  • At 12/16/2006 10:54 PM, Blogger Michael Turton said…

    Sorry, Feli. I meant that if you give without expectation of return to people you know, eventually you begin to resent them for always taking and never giving. That is the way people are built, and it's a good thing too. Generosity implies not giving without expectation, but giving at a cost to oneself. We do not consider someone generous who gives things that cost him nothing, whether or not he expects payback. One always expects some kind of payback in acts of generosity, though it may not always be in the same form or same time. It is true that reciprocity is different from generosity, but the latter is the lubricant that maintains the former. Watch and see how quickly your marriage fails if you stop being generous to your spouse.

    An excellent introduction to the evolution of generosity is _The Mating Mind_ by Geoffry Miller.



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